A Snark By Any Other Name

Recently I’ve decided playing a most dangerous and unwise game.  A player engrossed in said game may find it so addictive, may throw caution and wise judgement into the wind.  Let me present to you the game of snarking.

snarking (v): (1) The delivery of sarcastic but humorous comments.  The humour may be lost on the recipient of comment.  (2) The humorous practise of using bands small voracious Xen aliens against other Half-Life players.  This humour may also be lost on the recipient.  Still other players will display amusement watching recipient run screaming through a level, followed by a horde of jumping squeaking snarks. (3) The insanely humorous practise of combining practises (1) & (2).

And that is the game I shall play…  Yes, kids this the stuff idle minds come up to keep themselves amused during a workweek.

A New Era in UNIX Timestamps

If you haven’t heard it already, today the UNIX timestamp rolls over 1234567890.  Apparently that is how many seconds  have past since the beginning of the UNIX time epoch: January 1, 1970.  So get your geek on, and party like it is… well… 1234567890 seconds since January 1, 1970.

A Short Paper on Snowfall and its Effects on a Northerly People

We take a break from our regularly scheduled program on technology, gaming, freedom, life management and progress updates; for a totally pointless post.

Up in the frigid northern regions called Canada, there lives a nation of people who well… basically live there. The very thought that someone would want to north of the 49th parallel, is downright shocking to Canadian’s southerly neighbours. More shocking is the revelation that said Canadians in fact do not normally consider dog sleds a mode of transportation. Nor do they consider igloos as mortgageable housing. Something that is not shocking is the presence of a substance known as snow.

Snow, or the collective name of crystalized water droplets in flake form, is a common occurence in Canada. In fact snow is the second prefered form of precipitation in the wet winter season. Rain is naturally prefered but not when combined with freezing temperatures. Oddly regardless of the number of times a Canadian has experienced snowfall, they react as someone who has seen the phenomena for the first time.

A Canadian will at first mention of a coming snowfall, will deny the existence of snow or its falling. Once the first snowflakes appear near the ground, a Canadian will appear shocked. Then dismay will follow. This dismay may lead to a near complete loss of driving abilities. Additionally, a significant amount of flakes accumulate on the ground, can profoundly affect the mood of a Canadian. A normally cheery and sensitive Canadian can be an unhappy, grumbling, insensitive individual. While other events can affect Canadians such as: election day, a referendum on Quebec separation or the unlikeliness of a Canadian team winning the Stanley Cup; these events happen with significantly less frequency. Such behaviour in a northerly people is confusing, given the frequent nature of snowfall.

There are a select few who worship the coming of snow. But even these rare individuals admit it, they prefer if the snow remained solely on top of hills and mountains rather than on roads. Also children seem to appreciate snowfall more than adults. However this appreciation is shortlived if the quantity of snow is less than required to close local schools.

The benefits of snowfall in Canada are multitude. Snowfall for one gives Canadians free exercise. It also cultivates the skill of shovelling. While a more profitable skill in the 19th century thanks to the use of coal and steam engines, shovelling can provide meaningful employment in construction, irrigation maintainence and ditch digging. Paradoxically, snowfall also provides a form of national unity.

The researchers of this paper recommend that a more thorough study on the contradictory nature of snowfall and Canadian attitudes is in order. The researchers are currently applying for a grant from the Metrological division of the National Research Council to cover costs of supply, equipment and travel to conventions held in more southerly countries.

This message was sponsored by local snowplow drivers and disgrunteled snowshovel wielding Canadians. And is dedicated to a certain ice princess.